True story - at 3am this morning I went outside to dump my trash and there was a boy squatting in the circle outside Gwathmey, writing in the sand. As I slipped past, I heard my name. It was a terrifying moment, until I realised it was Brian. He had earlier made a bonfire out of the pizza boxes he'd been using to construct models for architecture class and was writing a message with the ashes. I'm a little worried about him.

I've never been an affectionate person (which is entirely different from being a sentimental person) and maybe that's why I initiate hugs with such clinical deliberation; one sign of affirmation, or love-language like we were talking about at Josh's birthday dinner. I also wish these things could be spontaneous, not an essential farewell trigger. But they can't be because if you hug only person A you often leave person B standing there awkwardly.
I generally prefer being hug-initiator rather than hug-receiver, because it involves meaningfully stepping into someone's personal space. And that isn't always easy. A physical extension of one moment.
I also don't like having to hug someone I don't actually want to experience this physical extension with. Again, essential. You can't exactly reject a social-hug, can you?

Can't wait for tomorrow; since I'm getting a ride from William to NoVa I can stay over at Winnie's for the night.
Because I'm scared I keep telling myself to think about the summer as creating a new space and already amazing, because it is
1. Self-attained-internship Summer
2. Potter Summer
3. Letter-and-email Summer (one snail-mail promise!)
4. Anjie-visits Summer
5. Language-immersion Summer. I am looking forward to taking Spanish next semester because I know it will make me very uncomfortable. Consequently, I think on how terrible I am at languages, probably because I have an attention-span the size of a sesame seed and don't like not being able to verbally express myself clearly. So, it'll be a rule to speak as much Mandarin as possible to get used to feeling lingually unstable.

I most look forward to the plane ride, 20 hours of doing only what I want albeit in a limited space, and what I want now is - blessed, uninterrupted sleep.